How do you deal with "Golden Handcuffs"?

[Weird Tolkienish Figure]

Where you are in a career position you're a bored of/tired of/actively hate but the pay, bennies and stability make it hard to justify leaving?

If I'm really honest, there's a certain question of fear and risk too?

[TBH]

I have been in that situation more than once. My approach is to a.) actively work to make the job better and learn what I can while I'm there and b.) set financial goals for myself that will allow me to leave. Like having X amount in savings, or having X amount in side-hustle income. I did this once and managed to leave an entire career I hated (mostly, still doing it very part time.) It's one of my biggest sources of pride professionally--that I managed to get out of that career.

[Weird Tolkienish Figure]

I have been in that situation more than once. My approach is to a.) actively work to make the job better and learn what I can while I'm there and b.) set financial goals for myself that will allow me to leave. Like having X amount in savings, or having X amount in side-hustle income. I did this once and managed to leave an entire career I hated (mostly, still doing it very part time.) It's one of my biggest sources of pride professionally--that I managed to get out of that career.

Thank you for your response.

I did some reading on this in other areas.

One piece of advice is to work towards a "walk away fund". In addition to getting rid of most of your debt (excluding mortgage debt), you have 6 months of after tax salary saved up. This lessons the risk.

I really like your idea of having an "income goal" for side businesses! Great idea!

[Thrif-t]

Ugh, I'm living this now! I have a great job but am getting sick of the place and everything that goes with it. I only work part time and make a good salary, have vacation, and the option to work from home. It's perfect!

So I just suck it up buttercup because I know I can't go anywhere else and make the money I make and get all I have working part time. It sucks it really does. But I just take it 8 hours at a time and that has been getting me by. Of course now that it is summer and I have time off during the week that makes it easier to just go in and work too and look forward to the days off.

I know no one feels sorry for me

[Weird Tolkienish Figure]

Ugh, I'm living this now! I have a great job but am getting sick of the place and everything that goes with it. I only work part time and make a good salary, have vacation, and the option to work from home. It's perfect!

So I just suck it up buttercup because I know I can't go anywhere else and make the money I make and get all I have working part time. It sucks it really does. But I just take it 8 hours at a time and that has been getting me by. Of course now that it is summer and I have time off during the week that makes it easier to just go in and work too and look forward to the days off.

I know no one feels sorry for me

One of the best pieces of advice I read on the subject was to establish a "walk-away" fund, 6 months of after tax salary to give a cushion to do something you'd find more interesting.

One piece of advice here was to create a side job business and create income goals for that.

Both good advice.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

Make a plan and leave. That's what we did. Make a plan and leave abruptly in some ways but choose a new path.

[ua_guy]

Where you are in a career position you're a bored of/tired of/actively hate but the pay, bennies and stability make it hard to justify leaving?

If I'm really honest, there's a certain question of fear and risk too?

I see you posted this question on Friday, but I think it's more appropriate for a Monday!!!

I really struggle with this. The very job I often hate affords me many things and situations that I really like, so I've never been very "motivated" to just leave.

This isn't a unique experience...a lot of data on jobs and happiness suggest that Americans are pretty unhappy with their jobs/employers a whole, and a lot of it has to do with fulfillment and purpose, unrelated to income. Because others suffer from the bondage of golden handcuffs doesn't really make the situation any more tenable for me. At the same time, I try to remember that in the grand scheme of things, I'm pretty fortunate. My challenge is more "mental" --it's my job to keep myself engaged, to make myself happy, and to keep bringing home money. If I can find the perfect job that doesn't disrupt all the other good things, then I'm all for making a change. To just quit, though--I think that's just a recipe to be unhappy AND without an income.

[daledegagne]

Where you are in a career position you're a bored of/tired of/actively hate but the pay, bennies and stability make it hard to justify leaving?

If I'm really honest, there's a certain question of fear and risk too?

I see this in clients frequently and your walk away fund is a great idea.

My advice to clients typically also involves working with the current employer to re-arrange the work environment if possible.

Failing that, a faster road out may be to actively look for other jobs that may bring more life satisfaction. To aid in this, you may want to look at your cash flow requirements and see if you can find creative ways to reduce expenses without feeling like you're sacrificing quality of life. When your cash flow requirements are lower, it makes it easier to take a dream job, even if it pays less.

Lastly, I encourage more of a walk away plan than a fund. For many this includes starting a side hustle that they love. And it always focuses on cash flow rather than lump sum size. This is because spending out of a lump sum you have saved creates a poverty mentality and emotionally/psychologically that's a really hard place to be. Focus on the cash flow your lump sum helps you create and use that as your gauge for when you can walk away comfortably.

[daledegagne]

This isn't a unique experience...a lot of data on jobs and happiness suggest that Americans are pretty unhappy with their jobs/employers a whole, and a lot of it has to do with fulfillment and purpose, unrelated to income. Because others suffer from the bondage of golden handcuffs doesn't really make the situation any more tenable for me. At the same time, I try to remember that in the grand scheme of things, I'm pretty fortunate. My challenge is more "mental" --it's my job to keep myself engaged, to make myself happy, and to keep bringing home money. If I can find the perfect job that doesn't disrupt all the other good things, then I'm all for making a change. To just quit, though--I think that's just a recipe to be unhappy AND without an income.

For the mental side of it - in terms of motivation - I can suggest the book 'Drive' by Daniel Pink. His research on human motivation and the interaction of financial motivation vs. Autonomy, Mastery, and Purpose is incredible.

If you're searching for a happier path, it's essential.

[bennkar]

I certainly have the golden handcuffs right now. Almost 8 years and I will cross the finish line with a golden pension. Yeah, its hard to think of right now. Instead I look at shorter term goals like paying off the mortgage (done), getting $500k in total investments (done), taking future trips with my GF, working out to look and feel better, selling off my excess hobby items to increase my investments, and so on. Still... I can't help but think about retirement most every day. Hasn't driven me crazy (yet).

So I guess my advice is to work on other areas important to you. For me it was finances, health, relationships. They're all doing good now. As for my job, I try to find the highlights as I can and keep thinking it could be worse, a lot worse.

[riverwed070707]

Ugh, I'm living this now! I have a great job but am getting sick of the place and everything that goes with it. I only work part time and make a good salary, have vacation, and the option to work from home. It's perfect!

So I just suck it up buttercup because I know I can't go anywhere else and make the money I make and get all I have working part time. It sucks it really does. But I just take it 8 hours at a time and that has been getting me by. Of course now that it is summer and I have time off during the week that makes it easier to just go in and work too and look forward to the days off.

I know no one feels sorry for me

I see you posted this question on Friday, but I think it's more appropriate for a Monday!!!

I really struggle with this. The very job I often hate affords me many things and situations that I really like, so I've never been very "motivated" to just leave.

This isn't a unique experience...a lot of data on jobs and happiness suggest that Americans are pretty unhappy with their jobs/employers a whole, and a lot of it has to do with fulfillment and purpose, unrelated to income. Because others suffer from the bondage of golden handcuffs doesn't really make the situation any more tenable for me. At the same time, I try to remember that in the grand scheme of things, I'm pretty fortunate. My challenge is more "mental" --it's my job to keep myself engaged, to make myself happy, and to keep bringing home money. If I can find the perfect job that doesn't disrupt all the other good things, then I'm all for making a change. To just quit, though--I think that's just a recipe to be unhappy AND without an income.

Right there with both of you. I get major burnout, especially during my slower times of the year. But the money is good, the benefits are nice, I get 28 days of PTO a year, we can afford to take vacations and spend loosely and boat on the weekends... so on the surface its really not so bad. Long term plan is to generate enough rental income to be able to live on that and just immerse my free time in projects and causes that I find fulfilling and travel. I struggle the most with feeling like my work isn't meaningful and I really admire people who live day in and day out to make the world a better place.

Not sure I answered the question, but I feel your pain

[amarowsky]

I'm in a similar boat. I have a good paying job with great benefits and retirement. I'm also finishing up school and recently started an internship. Even though the internship is what I want, it will be a 20-30k pay cut (of about 65-75 k). And shifting from hourly to commission, so potentially higher ceiling, but insanely lower flOor. I'm just so nervous about the move not being what I think I am going to want. I'm currently 8.5 years in on my job, and if I stay here I won't have weekends off for the next 10-20 years. (Planning on starting a family in 3-5 years getting married in 11 months).

[dawnwes]

My husband is in somewhat that position. He feels that he has gone as far as he can in our city and is bored. HOWEVER, he is staying because moving jobs WILL require moving cities in his line of work (really, he has exhausted what he can find here) and we have teens, so I have said we cannot move until they are finished with high school.

Sometimes you have to suck it up.

Thankfully he isn't miserable, just would like something more challenging right now.

[Randomsaver]

Sometimes it's not even the job but the people around you.

[amarowsky]

Rebooting this thread with an update. Last month I graduated, so I started applying for jobs. My internship offered me a full time job. But the more I learned about the industry plus the more I read about how bs it was ( northwestern Mutual) I decided to decline the offer.

So I'm still on the railroad, working full time. My pay is tight around 65-70k , so I'm assuming I'll have you take a pay cut when/if I can get a job. My degree is a BA in business. I have 9 yrs experience on railroad as a a conductor and 1 year as a manager, 6 months in personal finance sales internship, and am currently learning application development (xml and python ).

I been applying to the big 3 automotive companies, but haven't heard anything yet and it's been a month. I also have been applying at engineering companies (sales, marketing, hr, or finance side). Still haven't heard anything or had an interview.

Any suggestions? Any tips for getting into somewhere as a 29 yr old with limited experience? Am I dumb for leaving a steady job (for the next 20 years) with satisfactory pay but a dead end as far as progres sion and an awful random schedule? If you have an example with a massive career shift id like to hear. Good or bad.