Advice on wedding budget planner

[Jcook]

I'm just a common man. I'm happy to announce my wedding. I won't be spending too much on the wedding ceremony, but we want to buy fine diamond rings for it. The ceremony is budgeted at $5K. We are planning to spend 2K each for the diamond ring. After that, I'm left with no savings. Should I drain all my savings on the wedding? My heart doesn't allow me to compensate on the ring. Need advice.

[pflyers85]

My advice would be to push the wedding date back if at all possible. If your savings are going to be wiped out from a $5K wedding ceremony and a $2K ring you really aren't on solid financial footing to enter into marriage. Financial discord is one of the leading causes of divorce so take some more time to save up to avoid starting your marriage with money trouble.

If you cannot move the date back and you are locked into a venue then you need to consider less expensive rings. Its fine to spend $2K on a ring if you saved up for it on top of what you already save for an emergency fund. But if you only have $2K left in a savings account it would be foolish to spend all $2K for a ring.

I have heard plenty of folks say that they wish that they spent less on their wedding. I have yet to hear anyone say that they wish they spent more.

[dawnwes]

Are the parents not contributing at all?

Can you get married in the courthouse and then have a reception sometime in the future?

Could you get a fake diamond now and buy her a nicer one sometime in the future?

We spent about $5K on our wedding back in 1995. We had a catered lunch and a nice cake. No alcohol. I don't think you could do what we did for those prices again. The luncheon was about $10/person including cake and my guess is that the price of that would be closer to $20 now. We had about 200 in attendance.

[snafu]

Welcome to SA. Congratulations on your engagement. I suspect you'd be surprised to learn the mark up on engagement and wedding rings is something over 1,000 percent. If you're set on buying diamonds, it's important to understand what you are buying. It just takes a few minutes to Google the 5 'C' s. That's carat, cut, color, clarity and certification.

98% of people can't tell a well made cubic zirconia [fake] diamond from real, only your credit card or bank account knows. I love beautiful, well made jewelry and fully understand it's worth about 10% of original costs if I chose to sell any piece.

[Jcook]

Thank you for all the advice.

Our parents will surely be giving cash gifts on the wedding. But the wedding expense needs to be meted out by us. I think the cash gift will be good savings for us.

I'm not going to push further the wedding because my best buddies are moving from here. We didn't have an actual engagement so, I wish to buy her a beautiful diamond ring.

When I was browsing, I found this platinum diamond ring in a diamond jeweler's site (pheradiamonds.com/shop/luxity). It's in my budget and looks pretty. I will have to call them up for other details.

[rennigade]

It doesnt take much money to get married/have a reception. You can spend as little or as much...it can be a small gathering or a large one.

Just remember...you're spending all that money to throw a party for someone else. You're the host...everyone else are guests. All these crazy decisions are to please other people...not you.

[msomnipotent]

Thank you for all the advice.

Our parents will surely be giving cash gifts on the wedding. But the wedding expense needs to be meted out by us. I think the cash gift will be good savings for us.

I'm not going to push further the wedding because my best buddies are moving from here. We didn't have an actual engagement so, I wish to buy her a beautiful diamond ring.

When I was browsing, I found this platinum diamond ring in a diamond jeweler's site (pheradiamonds.com/shop/luxity). It's in my budget and looks pretty. I will have to call them up for other details.

I am pretty sure the $1,500 is just for the setting and does not include a diamond. Did you price out what diamond you wanted?

[sv2007]

I'm just a common man. I'm happy to announce my wedding. I won't be spending too much on the wedding ceremony, but we want to buy fine diamond rings for it. The ceremony is budgeted at $5K. We are planning to spend 2K each for the diamond ring. After that, I'm left with no savings. Should I drain all my savings on the wedding? My heart doesn't allow me to compensate on the ring. Need advice.

You can ask your guests to give cash; I hear it it is the new "in" thing to do.
As for rings, you can always buy new ones later if you get something cheap now.
But it's also not a problem at all should you spring for what you really want; wedding is a once in a lifetime event; and if you miss it , you miss it forever.

So, there's no wrong move in your situation.

[Nutria]

wedding is a once in a lifetime event; and if you miss it , you miss it forever.

Lots of people have been through two.

So, there's no wrong move in your situation.

Sure there is: grossly overspending. The actual ceremony will be a blur, since you'll be so nervous, and the most important part of the reception for the bride will be dancing with her father.

(Note: I am not going to define what constitutes overspending, but OP should realize that this forum is SavingAdvice, not SpendingAdvice.)

[sv2007]

Lots of people have been through two.



Sure there is: grossly overspending. The actual ceremony will be a blur, since you'll be so nervous, and the most important part of the reception for the bride will be dancing with her father.

(Note: I am not going to define what constitutes overspending, but OP should realize that this forum is SavingAdvice, not SpendingAdvice.)

What others do should not matter to you. If your neighbor likes to marry once a year,does that mean you should? There are some peole who seem to constantly marry/divorce frequently, probably driving up the stats, but I don't think many people want to imitate that.

Marriage is a once a lifetime event for most people and so regrets here can last a lifetime.

[Nutria]

Marriage is a once a lifetime event for most people

That is not what you wrote earlier.

and so regrets here can last a lifetime.

How much of your wedding ceremony and reception do you remember? Or was it one big long blur?

[phantom]

Marriage is a once a lifetime event for most people and so regrets here can last a lifetime.

You can always throw another party later when you have more money. Even if you stay married for life, vow-renewals are always an option for those with regrets about how the original wedding celebration went. But, if you overspend, the impact can be much harder to deal with than regrets that you didn't throw a fancier party.

[sv2007]

You can always throw another party later when you have more money. Even if you stay married for life, vow-renewals are always an option for those with regrets about how the original wedding celebration went. But, if you overspend, the impact can be much harder to deal with than regrets that you didn't throw a fancier party.

Right; you can always do that.

What makes financial sense for some may not for others.
Instances in time is always hard to reproduce, people die, people change.

I've always found that recovery from a single, financial miscalculation isn't all that hard. It's the persistent desire and ability to commit errors that keeps one in the poor house.

[GoodSteward]

Weddings are for the brides. Most men could care less, most....

This is one of the benefits with following the bible "that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;"

We don't wear jewelry so this isn't something I had to figure out. Kinda silly when you think about it. Wearing more than many's monthly income on your finger just to show you are married. lol I have a lot to say on this subject, but that is for another day.

As for the dress, my wife found a 900$ dress for 99$ at Davids bridal. She looked amazing, and we felt good knowing we didn't spend a ton...well..her dad.

11 years later and 0 regrets about any of that!