i need life advice (18 years old)

**autoxer** · 03-11-2014, 08:03 AM

Originally posted by ShawnWalker View Post

I need to talk to somebody about life preferably a older male about what to do with my life I want to drop out of college and my parents are forcing me to go. I am failing right now. I am so sad. feel like a disappointment to my family.

I'm a 34 year old male with an B.S. in engineering.

Your parents just want you to be successful, but if you aren't putting in the effort yourself, then there isn't any benefit to forcing you to go to school. I know some people that are more successful than me without a college degree, and I know some people that regret not going to college right after high school, but everybody is different. My dad and my brother both failed out the first time, took some time away from school, then went back when they were ready to put in the effort. If you aren't doing it for yourself, then it is a waste of time and money.

After dropping out, what is your plan? Do you have a job? Is it something you want to do longterm?

**disneysteve** · 03-11-2014, 08:46 AM

How exactly does a parent force their child to go to college?

Why are you failing? Are you in a field of study that you don't like? If so, is there another field of study that does interest you?

If you stop attending college, what is your plan? What do you think you'd like to do with your life (as best as an 18-year-old can have an answer to that question)? Life is expensive. I won't say you can't make it without a degree but it certainly limits your options.

I'm curious who is currently paying for college. If your parents are paying, why would they want you to keep going if you don't want to be there and are failing?

Does your school have a career-counseling office? If so, have you met with them to discuss your future? I would strongly urge you to do that before you decide to drop out.

**bjl584** · 03-12-2014, 08:09 AM

This has nothing to do with college. It has to do with being happy with your life. I'd re-evaluate what you are doing. Why are you failing? Does your major not interest you? Does college as a whole not interest you? What does interest you? Would you be happier going to trade school? Not everyone can sit in a class room and take notes. Maybe you are more of a hands on type of person.

**ua_guy** · 03-24-2014, 10:05 AM

I'm 31, and had similar thoughts about leaving college about halfway through my degree when I was in my late teens like you. I stayed on the path and finished it, however.

It's important to figure out why you want to drop out. My decision to stick with school was a business decision. Having a degree was better than not. I had the encouragement of family and friends, and the financial situation was tenable. But I hated school. Loathed it, actually. I was attending a small religious college and discovered the whole experience was against who I was. I hated dorm life, I discovered I was no longer "religious", a lot of my peers turned out to be people I didn't want to have anything to do with. But, there was an end in sight, so attending class and keeping up my grades became a job. I aced the experience in 4 years and the feeling of accomplishment was pretty awesome. I made a lot of changes to make myself happy, but I did NOT drop out of school.

Private message me if you want to talk specifics or have questions.

My advice:

If you're going to drop out of college, have something better to do. If you don't, figure that out while you're still attending school.

A degree in your back pocket is never a bad thing. If you want to be a tradesman or work a "blue collar" job, that's fine. Do it once you finish school. Yes, your peers will have 4+ years experience more than you. Who cares. You too will build experience. Also realize the long-term income of skilled tradesmen without degrees is less than people with degrees.

Your happiness is important above all else. Just be cautious about making big decisions and closing doors of opportunity so you can get some happiness in the short term.

**adviceseeker** · 03-31-2014, 04:46 PM

What makes you sad? What makes you think that you're a failure to the family? I feel that you have something heavy in your heart that makes you feel this way...

**Joly0520** · 11-04-2014, 10:29 PM

I think yo should study more .of course you should enjoy life .you can buy somethings what you like ,i like make up, I feel enjoying ,i like to buy things in ebay like false eyelashes

**mortgagereport** · 11-15-2014, 09:48 AM

I concur with most of the replies above. Before you do anything, the most important thing is to decide what it is you truly value. It doesn't have to be your final answer to that question; my values are constantly evolving. But it is important to have values and goals that are at least stable enough that after a few weeks you are already interested in something else.

i need life advice (18 years old)