I'm boring and scared of spending money

[disneysteve]

If it's simply that your friends think you should stay at the Four Seasons

When friends tell me we "should" do something, I usually say, "That sounds great. Are you paying for it?"

[rennigade]

Agree with others. Dont wait until you're retired to start enjoying life...traveling for example. If you can and want to...do that throughout your life.

We've been on some grueling hikes. No way would I be able to do some of those when I was 50. And if I did it would be much more difficult and the recovery time would be much longer. I wouldnt have enjoyed it as much.

My FIL used to scruba dive all the time when he was younger...now he's afraid to. He tried it a few years back and basically had a panic attack...luckily at a shallow depth.

And yes...life is "boring" for most people. The majority of us have the same routine. Its not a bad thing...thats life. As long as you mix it up every now and then you'll feel better about the whole situation. Life is short...enjoy it while you can.

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I just booked us 4 days at Disneyland $2200 for us. Last night. I decided time to loosen the purse strings. I don't think the $1000 purse will make me happy it was just a symbol of spending more period. When I booked the hotel (Disneyland) I didn't look for the best deal instead I booked something I thought we'd like and spend a few hundred more. Before I'd probably just book the deal and save the $300 but I know my DH wants a nicer hotel.

Sort of like Singuy, I feel like I do want to spend more. I think it's time we might start spending a bit more. This year our investments returned more than our living expenses by a lot. I'm planning on DH's 40th trip somewhere for a weekend just us. I decided it's time to bite the bullet and live a little.

No I don't feel deprived about buying things because I hate shopping. I buy what I want foodwise and eat out. But I have been hedging a lot on the minivan. I'm pondering the return on selling my car which is not old by a long shot 2010 Subaru outback and getting a minivan. My last car was 1998 Toyota corolla sold in 2012 so I'm not into cars. And the minivan I wanted in 2010 but we couldn't afford it then and it didn't make sense to pay for a minivan with 1 kid. Now I'm hedging. And even the minivan feels like and indulgence. If we buy it we'll keep it 10 years maybe longer. But we had agreed to buying the house and renovations then seeing how our money shakes out before deciding on a new car. But can I really pull the trigger?

Just thinking a lot about not waiting like DS said for time to pass by.

[Singuy]

You are assuming that you can't both work and enjoy life. Sorry, but I firmly disagree. I work full time. Still, in the past year, we have been to Disney World twice, taken a Caribbean cruise, visited Phoenix, hiked the south rim of the Grand Canyon, spent a few days in NYC, and are about to leave for a week in Kentucky (among other smaller experiences we've had). We've been to arts festivals, food truck festivals, various concerts and shows. We've dined out at fine restaurants and some real dive places with great food (usually the BBQ joints ).

I've got no problem going to work each day and then enjoying the fruits of my labor when I'm not at work. Would it be even better to not have to work? Probably. But I like what I do. We're saving plenty. Who knows what the future holds. My father died pretty young. My wife's father died even younger. I've already lost a friend or two and I'm only 53. I want to enjoy every day, not work my butt off and hope I get to enjoy future days.

There's a difference between living my life to the fullest vs enjoying the few vacations we are ultimately granted by upper manager due to obligations from work.

Do I enjoy the cruises or the other moments here and there? Sure.....but this is just an appetizer for me. I want to go visit a country not to just go to all the tourist traps, but actually live there for a few months at a time...eat what the locals eat, shop were the locals shop..have conversations with people who are born there..etc etc. Then when I'm done with that place, I'll go to another, and another. This is what I mean by not wasting every second..and this can't be accomplished right now because I don't have enough passive income.

[Nutria]

I decided it's time to bite the bullet and live a little.

[disneysteve]

There's a difference between living my life to the fullest vs enjoying the few vacations we are ultimately granted by upper manager due to obligations from work.

Do I enjoy the cruises or the other moments here and there? Sure.....but this is just an appetizer for me. I want to go visit a country not to just go to all the tourist traps, but actually live there for a few months at a time...eat what the locals eat, shop were the locals shop..have conversations with people who are born there..etc etc. Then when I'm done with that place, I'll go to another, and another. This is what I mean by not wasting every second..and this can't be accomplished right now because I don't have enough passive income.

I don't personally have any desire to do that. I find that after a couple of weeks away, I'm usually ready to head home. That said, I do dream about doing a circumnavigation cruise some day. Those run about 150 days more or less. The itinerary gets tweaked every year. I've always said that would be my retirement gift to myself.

[Singuy]

I don't personally have any desire to do that. I find that after a couple of weeks away, I'm usually ready to head home. That said, I do dream about doing a circumnavigation cruise some day. Those run about 150 days more or less. The itinerary gets tweaked every year. I've always said that would be my retirement gift to myself.

Different strokes for different folks. I usually drag my wife down a beaten path on every shore excursion when off the cruise ship for example. Like in Bahamas, most people end up visiting the 5 star Atlantis hotel resort. We however ended up getting a 2 dollar bus ticket and mingled with the locals and visiting the back roads and see what life is really like. I bet no one on our cruise will have the crazy experience we had on the bus ride. It was a bus with a huge subwoofer blasting Reggae about the daughter singing about how her father raped her..and people were singing along.

Usually people don't want to associate themselves with third world culture..going to places that are way below U.S standards...I don't want to be one of those Americans who sit back and judge them while not trying to understand where they come from.

[disneysteve]

Different strokes for different folks. I usually drag my wife down a beaten path on every shore excursion when off the cruise ship for example. Like in Bahamas, most people end up visiting the 5 star Atlantis hotel resort. We however ended up getting a 2 dollar bus ticket and mingled with the locals and visiting the back roads and see what life is really like.

My wife and I differ in that regard. I like to do what you describe. She is less adventurous and prefers to stay to the areas she at least perceives as safer.

I have prevailed numerous times, though. When we went to San Juan, we wanted to go to the Bacardi factory but didn't want to pay what they were charging for the excursion on the ship ($50 I think). We got off the ship and asked a taxi driver how much it would be and he wanted like $25/person which was still too much. I asked someone at the port to tell me the cheapest way to get there. He directed us to the next pier and said to take the ferry across the bay and get a taxi on the other side. The ferry was $0.50/person. The taxi was $5. So we ended up at a tourist attraction but had a locals experience on the way, and saved a ton of money (there were 5 of us).

In St. Lucia, we took a city "bus" crammed with locals into town to shop at the local market away from the touristy shops and mass-produced souvenirs.

In St. Thomas, we ventured beyond the port area and walked well into town, probably the only people from the ships in port who did so. We found the local flavor and better prices on alcohol to take back with us.

[Sallyr70]

This is a great thread! I'm the most boring person in the world in my opinion. I work a boring 40 hr/wk job (I enjoy the people and the company benefits), I have no kids, my partner and I are homebodies and rarely eat out, go the movies, etc. We have an annual trip to Hawaii (make sure to go in the off season, as crowds are annoying and stressful) and the occasional short road trip. We don't have big families, so there's not a lot of family events. We just enjoy our home, doing the maintenance and relaxing on our time off. I've recently put out a bunch of bird feeders and enjoy seeing all the birds, squirrels, rabbits etc visiting every day. I'm 47 but I'm sure I sound like I'm much older! But I feel like I'm 30.

My focus is maintaining good health and enjoying just being me. I no longer feel like I have to keep buying stuff and paying for experiences I'm not interested in. I'm starting to look ahead to retirement- my goal is to retire at 60. I'm already volunteering at the humane society because I love cats, and once I'm retired I'd like to spend more time doing that, and something helping seniors like delivering Meals on Wheels.

[disneysteve]

I think one could easily replace the word "boring" with the word "calm". Boring has such a negative connotation. There's nothing at all wrong with having a calm lifestyle. The key is if you enjoy it. Sallyr70's post uses that word -ENJOY - several times.

If you are happy doing what you're doing, keep doing it. You don't need to change to match someone else's lifestyle or spending habits if that's not what makes you happy.

[Singuy]

I would love to blow my money on crazy things..just working toward a responsible way to do so.

I would say that this will be my "calm" before the storm

[LivingAlmostLarge]

I'm going to start spending more money. Granted I am spending enough on home renovations and everything else that is coming up with it. But not the house, just other stuff.

[msomnipotent]

Good! Money is just a tool to be used for your pleasure. I had to stop reading Bogleheads for a long time because so many people were posting about having anxiety about spending money that they could well afford, it was giving me anxiety.

[disneysteve]

I'm going to start spending more money.

On what?

[kork13]

On what?

Yes, tell all -- We want to live through your newfound less-penny-pinching ways!