Going to let the forum decide for me.

[Scanner]

DS,

I did not know that - I guess this is the "Winter of My Discontent" then.

[Scanner]

PS:

I just looked at my interest rate (not sure if this makes a difference) because I am still compiling tax records:

5.25%

That being said, it's variable and could be raised. (let's face it - probably will be)

It's an unsecured business line of credit (yeah, lol. . .the banks still do this post-subprime debacle).

Last year total interest paid: $68.15 (deductible)
Interest this year so far: $27.68

Any of this make a difference? Or should I just go with setting up the SEP-IRA?

[tripods68]

Sorry to hear about your marriage situation.....

Since you don't have the clearest head at this time, you should take a break from your thinking how to fund your ROTH for 2010. Wait until you have establish your new life this year and worry about it till then up to April 15, 2011 to decide. Just a thought....

[Slug]

A. I'm sorry you're going through this.
B. Putting yourself first also puts your kids first. From all that I've read from you, you clearly have a good head on your shoulders and will do whatever you can to protect the interests of your children. I don't know your wife, but it seems she would be unlikely to match your financial acumen.
C. Trust the CPA. Due to antiquated laws, divorces do not necessarily reflect the functioning of today's households. Protect yourself and your income for yours and children's sake.

[Scanner]

Slug,

Thank you. .. that's just it. . .if I could redirect most of my discretionary income into 529's and Retirement, that's what I would do for the kids. What do I need to spend my money on? I drive an old car, will probably live in a double wide trailer near my parents at the NJ shore, and rarely take vacations.

Except that 529's aren't tax deductible. . .so I would paying child support based on the income before the contribution to my kid's college.

I wouldn't mind some other arrangement but my wife is impossible to talk to. . .like perhaps I am on the hook for 2/3rds of their college someday. . .I guess I can see the risk in that though. . .like what if I didn't follow through. . .I would be open to a yearly audit to make sure I was contributing though.

Anyway, I have started to figure that out - taking care of me isn't a bad thing per se. . .I am runnign 5K's and really living healthily and trying to re-establish my career. Hopefully I can get through this.

[creditcardfree]

If you can pay off whatever you borrow in a year, I say go for it. You probably need proof of taxable income now for 2009, to reduce child support now, right? Of course, I don't know how much a $5000 reduction saves you in child support.

[Scanner]

Creditcard,

I am not really worried about reducing child support right now. . .but what is more than likely to happen is my income will be higher for 2010, working 2 jobs. . .and there's the dilemma.

My attorney tells me child support is normally adjusted every 3 years in the state, unless something else happens (a job loss, laid off, in which case you have to file a motion), or something else is agreed to up front.

I did some research on the SEP-IRA - it does seem to work in that the income gets reduced on the Schedule C, which means I am saving on that double taxation that self-employed people get. Probably should have been doing this for years anyway vs. the Roth IRA. The Roth was always so attractive to me though, beccause the thought of just havintg tax free income someday as it's distriubted seemed attractive to me.

But it may make more sense to reduce my declared expense now. . .this needs to be a 3 way conversation between my CPA and attorney.

[Scanner]

How about a job as moderator here in a "Divorcing" section?. . .it's a topic all it's own I have experience with

I work cheap (I won't charge $50/hour )

Seriously. . .it's the biggest financial adjustment that 50% of people have to make in their lifetime.

[disneysteve]

it's the biggest financial adjustment that 50% of people have to make in their lifetime.

You know, I have always wondered about that 50% figure. How do they calculate that? I know plenty of people who have gotten divorced but it is nowhere near 50% of the people I know who are married. It is probably more like 5% if that. Does anyone know how they arrive at the 50% divorce rate?

[Scanner]

I don't know. . .I admit I just drew that out of the air from "pop news."

My son commmented taht every fmaily in our neighborhood has been hit, that we were the second to last one standing.

[disneysteve]

I just did a little Googling and found multiple sites saying the same thing: the 50% rate is false. It is based on faulty math. It also oversimplifies some things like the fact that 2nd and 3rd marriages end in divorce at a far higher rate than 1st marriages and that skews the overall divorce rate upward. The divorce rate is also influenced by income and education level, going lower as income and education level increase. So while the 50% figure gets thrown around a lot, it simply isn't true.

[jIM_Ohio]

I just did a little Googling and found multiple sites saying the same thing: the 50% rate is false. It is based on faulty math. It also oversimplifies some things like the fact that 2nd and 3rd marriages end in divorce at a far higher rate than 1st marriages and that skews the overall divorce rate upward. The divorce rate is also influenced by income and education level, going lower as income and education level increase. So while the 50% figure gets thrown around a lot, it simply isn't true.

It starts with the parents and grandparents

My mother is one of 6 kids
most of those kids had at least 2 kids, some had 3-4

I am one of 4+4+3+2+1+2=16 cousins.. all but 2 which are age of majority are married (3 of my cousins are in HS or younger). So 11 of 16 are married...
of those cousins there are 3+2+2+2+2+1+1=13 kids (might be off on this, oldest is about 10 yo)

16 marriages, plus the 6 aunts/uncles, plus their parents. 23 marriages total.

Not a single divorce
One of marriages has had spouse die already, other than that it appears very unlikely the 50% statistic hits us.

[Scanner]

Ironically we both have good families that we come from - her parents have a solid marriage as do mine. From that standpoint only, it's puzzling along with we are both educated and despite her protests to the contrary, not destitute - we had amassed some amouht of wealth and our joint tax return this year was six figures.

I am not sure why you would exclude second marriages from the stat. I'll admit one of my big fears after this trauma is making the wrong choice again. (or maybe there is soemthing flawed about me is another fear - maybe I was meant for bachelorhood).

But I do have to say this. . .I have a friend teaching me to be a bachelor again. . .we both figured it out and out of 11 guys in our class, we are the only 2 left as bachelors (he's never been married, the perpetual womanizer).

It's like you are saying, "Well, second marriage failed - that doesn't count. . .you're just a loser who's perpetually not committed. We'll strike that off the statistic."

I am not being oversensitive I think, but why wouldn't you consider a 2nd or 3rd marriage in the divorce rate?

[LivingAlmostLarge]

No it's that 2nd and 3rd marriages fail more than 50% skewing it higher. The first divorce is the hardest, after that it's a lot easier.

[disneysteve]

I am not sure why you would exclude second marriages from the stat.

No it's that 2nd and 3rd marriages fail more than 50% skewing it higher.

Right. The point is that the divorce rate for 2nd and 3rd (and 4th, 5th, etc.) marriages is much higher than for 1st marriages so people who have multiple divorces raise the average divorce rate. Just picking numbers here but if 30% of 1st mortgages end in divorce and 75% of 2nd and 3rd marriages end in divorce, the average divorce rate might be 50% but telling newly 1st married couples that half of them will get divorced isn't actually true.