Did you consider spouse's spending habits before marriage?

[pearlieq]

Someone described marriage for males as sort of being a domesticated cat - you look out the window. . .you would really like to go prowling. . .probably all harmless stuff. . .you would like to get out. . .but you can't. You know it's warmer in here and your well-fed.

Would you be surprised to know that women feel the same way? I'm not sure it's even a gender issue--just the natural human inclination to wonder about the path not taken.

Sometimes I look out my window and think about what my fabulous, footloose and fancy-free life would have been like. High powered job, adorable place of my own in a hip city neighborhood, an endless supply of stylish clothes, and dashing men whose laundry I'd never have to deal with.

We have our own yearnings about adventure and self-possesion. There's a reason why Sex and the City was such a popular TV show!

[Homebody]

I married at age 21 and didn't consider my own spending habits, let alone his. I "woke up" first when it hit me that I could not be a SAHM after my first child was born. DH has always liked to spend more than me, but he's now slowly coming around as he is getting older and thinking about wanting to be able to retire someday.

Um ditto, only I was 20 and DH turned 20 two days before we were married. I was pregnant with daughter #1.

[asmom]

Would you be surprised to know that women feel the same way? I'm not sure it's even a gender issue--just the natural human inclination to wonder about the path not taken.

Sometimes I look out my window and think about what my fabulous, footloose and fancy-free life would have been like. High powered job, adorable place of my own in a hip city neighborhood, an endless supply of stylish clothes, and dashing men whose laundry I'd never have to deal with.

We have our own yearnings about adventure and self-possesion. There's a reason why Sex and the City was such a popular TV show!

[disneynutt]

I knew what I was getting into when DH and I got married a few months ago. We've been together for 10 years and we've both made our share of financial mistakes. The only thing we can do now is move forward and learn how to not make those same mistakes again. We're working on it, and doing ok, but it's a slow road. Moreso since we're helping my parents get out of a hole they've been in because my father was sick for a while this past year.

[Ima saver]

My dh did not have much money, but he has always been the hardest working man that I have ever seen. He worked til noon today and has been out side now for seven hours working on the yard.

[shengmei]

We were both very young when we got married, and our spending habits had considerably changed in the one year we had been married.

I believe my hubby was a responsible man, but he did once extremely shock me by throwing away a $200 set of watercolor pencils. I think he had repeatedly apologized for that incident. With his credentials and work ethics, he could probably become one of those millionaires......so I think earning potential is more important to me than spending habits, since spending habits can be changed easily (at least in our case).

[Elgin526]

I was aware of DH's money "issues" and decided to marry him anyway! Money problems can be fixed, and DH seemed flexible enough to learn (it's taken longer than I hoped, but he has come around). I've also learned to be more flexible. At first I wanted to be debt free ASAP, DH just balked at that, he doesn't want to do without for as long as it would take to do that. So we are taking a slower road to being debt free. It's either that or fight about money all the time, so I'd rather take it slower and be happy, than be debt free and divorced! We are compantable in every other way, so I feel it's worth the effort.